The Girls' Guide to Dating Zombies by Lynn Messina

She has naturally concluded that the man reading in the conservatory must be the country cousin (who else in London would actually read?) and is quite vexed to discover that he is the Duke of Trent himself-imagine, stealing the duke’s prize Rhyncholaelia digbyana under his very nose! But her vexation doesn’t last long. Miss Emma Harlow hasn’t earned the reputation as a hoyden for nothing, so when the Duke of Trent discovers her in his conservatory stealing one of his orchids, he’s isn’t surprised-charmed, delighted and puzzled, yes, but not surprised. Who ever heard of a gentleman being so handsome and so intelligent and so well informed about foreign flora? Clearly, the man needs to be taken down a peg, and somehow, despite all twenty-four years of faultless propriety, Vinnie is just the hoyden to do it. Oh, especially the marquess, whose perfection she finds intolerable. Only she can't help but chafe at the way everyone keeps demanding that she decline at once, even the marquess. He does it as a joke, of course, to get back at her for an imagined slight-well, to be fair, she had insulted his writing-and Vinnie, older sister to the infamous Harlow Hoyden, is far too sensible to rise to his ridiculous challenge.ĭetermined to head off further scandal (her name has already been recorded in the betting book at Brooks's!), Vinnie dashes off a polite note refusing the honor-which she has every intention of sending. Worst of all, the human male appears to have impaired her ability to think clearly.A woman in the British Horticultural Society! The very idea horrifies everyone, including ardent horticulturalist Lavinia Harlow, whose own name has been put forth for membership by the provoking Marquess of Huntly. Now Hattie, the consummate professional, is acting like a single girl at the end of the twentieth century: self-conscious, klutzy and unable to form a coherent sentence without babbling.

Granted access to the inner sanctum of zombaceuticals, she meets an actual, living, breathing M-A-N. Her practical how-to impresses the CEO of the largest drug company in the world, and before she knows it, Hattie, a reporter for a downmarket tabloid that specializes in conspiracy theories, is sitting down with the woman who single-handedly invented the zombie-behavioral-modification market. So she writes 'The Girls' Guide to Dating Zombies' to help her fellow single women navigate the zombie-relationship waters. Hattie Cross knows what you're thinking: Zombie sex? Epercent of human males into zombies, it's statistically impossible to meet-let alone date-the remaining 0.00001 percent.

The Girls' Guide to Dating Zombies by Lynn Messina